


premonition paranoia

by cloversluck



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: -Up until the last episode, 6B final redo, Canon Compliant, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-25
Updated: 2017-09-25
Packaged: 2019-01-05 03:21:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12181917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cloversluck/pseuds/cloversluck
Summary: She only had herself to blame. Nobody made her do anything, nobody else was even aware of what she was doing in the first place. It was a well kept secret.Until it wasn’t.What do you even say to try and fix a problem that to you, doesn’t seem like one? Sure she lied, but it came from a good place. There wasn’t an intent to upset anybody, she wasn’t trying to upset him.‘But you did.’





	premonition paranoia

**Author's Note:**

> so this started off being another chapter in my drabble series but then it got too long so here we are.

Lying to him all these weeks hadn’t been a good idea. 

Honestly, she isn’t positive what had been expected the end result of everything to be. Maybe something that wasn’t the actual reality they were in. The reality that she was in. 

Hes upset. 

Hurt was probably a better word to describe how he seemed to feel if she really had to label it. 

The whole thing was confusing to Lydia, it made her feel…disoriented. 

It’s uncommon for him to be genuinely upset with her. As a person that gets upset over the smallest of things she always found it ironic that it took so much for him to even consider feeling angry at her. 

Even during those times that he was, it was based on her own pride. Her not wanting to back down frustrated him since his fears revolved around not being able to keep her safe. 

It was a relatable problem to have. One that she knew all too well expect in her case it was centered on him. 

Sure, she had concerns about her own safety. Didn’t everybody? 

The difference is that she was never gone. 

She hadn’t disappeared for three months, sent to a place that defied almost every scientific law that existed. 

The event made her paranoid which had been clear to everybody that was around her. It drove her motivation to keep him away from it all. 

Back when she had first returned it hadn’t been her intention to stay. 

She along with Scott and Malia were all going to leave, passing the torch to the younger pack members. All three of them were determined to make new lives for themselves that didn’t involve spending almost every day trying to save the entire towns worth of people. 

Not even a week into them all being back in Beacon Hills did those plans change. 

Honestly, it’s what sparked the sudden need. The need to lie regarding her whereabouts. 

Everything started when she had failed to mention her new plans.

The conversation was always averted and quickly changed when he started to question what was going on with her. How the new school was and if the adjustment had been difficult. 

This has escalated into dropping calls and ignoring certain messages in fear that he would see through what she was saying. 

Due to the fact that she was ‘in school’ her inability to talk quite as often as he had hoped wasn’t a surprise nor was it out of character for her in the moment. It was easily explained and he failed to question it. 

Everything was working out in her favor, giving her a slight sense of relief that at least somebody, at least _he_ was in a safe place. 

That all came crashing down when he had abruptly made his unprompted return to the town. Much to the surprise of literally everyone, especially Lydia. 

There wasn’t a way to explain what she had said and why. 

The uncertainty of it all made it easy to avoid him..that is until an issue arose that required the brains of the pack to deduce and find a solution. 

The department was theirs. Always had been and unfortunately for Lydia in this very moment, still was. 

After it was realized that huddling together and reminiscing the past wasn’t the best idea during a sort of war outbreak, they had decided to break up into teams. 

Scott placing them all in their groups was what eventually gave Lydia away since it had been accidentally slipped that she has had to do double the work without him here. 

**“Thank god for Lydia and Mason! Taking over the heap of it with you gone and everything.”** Yeah, sure. That’s one way to put it. 

She only had herself to blame. Nobody made her do anything, nobody else was even aware of what she was doing in the first place. It was a well kept secret. 

Until it wasn’t. 

What do you even say to try and fix a problem that to you, doesn’t seem like one? Sure she lied, but it came from a good place. There wasn’t an intent to upset anybody, she wasn’t trying to upset him. 

_‘But you did.’_

An audible sigh left her mouth. 

It would probably be best that she focused on the actual issues at hand, after all Stiles didn’t seem to have any problem doing so. 

Her gaze shifted to where he was skimming through books on the shelf at the school library that they were currently in. 

He didn’t seem bothered in the slightest, or well not outwardly. Some of his gestures were off but he appeared okay. 

Normally it would bother her, that falling feeling where she knows that she is losing an argument but she couldn’t focus on that. It took her breath away how okay he looked. Not worn down and physically battered from all of the constant chaos that went on here. His features were rested and filled with determination. 

Unlike the rest of them he seemed stable, at least slightly. 

In the long run, it’s all she wanted. To see this side of him again. 

“Here. I found something.” his voice rang out through the silent area. 

Her head picked up when she saw that he was walking towards her with an old looking book. 

“What is it?” 

 

He placed it on the table out in front of her while looking at his phone for apparent updates from the pack. 

“Nothing.” 

“.…Nothing?” 

“I’m _pretty_ sure they only sent us to do this because they didn’t want either of us to be involved.” 

“That makes no sense I’ve been here-”

He flinched at her words. 

“Stiles..” 

“We should probably try and figure something out-”

“I know I shouldn’t have lied about where I was and what was happening.” she cut him off abruptly, knowing that there probably wouldn’t be another good time to discuss this before returning to the fight. 

He looked at her oddly for a second before laughing slightly to himself. The noise made her uncomfortable, it seemed to send their current state further into unfamiliar territory. 

“I can’t lose you Lydia.” 

“I’m not going-”

“You know what I mean.” 

She wasn’t sure how to respond. There was a crossroad with this situation, both sides of it leading to a place that would create more potential issues.

“Yeah.” 

She pushed the chair that she was on back, standing up shortly after while making sure to grab a hold of her purse that was resting on its side her hand shaking a bit.

It was unknown to her how things were going to get patched back up. Both of them were not sure how to talk to the other about it, clearly. 

_‘What the hell am I supposed to do now?’_

A slight bit of panic could be felt in her stomach now, her heart beats quickening. 

“Lydia?” 

She turned to him, her face not expressing any of the distress she felt on the inside. 

“Yeah…okay, let’s go.” 

They would figure it out. 

\-----

Everything was happening so quickly, too quickly. 

It had been decided that they were going to go back to where everybody else had been despite the efforts the other pack members made to keep the two of them away. 

The place was unfamiliar to her and Stiles. The map of it yet to be fully understood. 

There were tunnels, honestly when weren’t there. 

All of them wound around in the old buildings, creating a sort of maze for anybody who dare enter. 

Unfortunately it got the best of them, out smarting their plan of being in charge of the opposite ends to see if they could quickly find their currently missing friends. 

She stepped forward in the room that she was in, noticing a trend at this point in them all. There was nothing anywhere, save for the obvious layers of dirt and bad interior design choices. 

Everything felt unstable around her like the entirety of it could come crashing down at any moment. 

_‘Isn’t that just the perfect metaphor for my life right now.’_

A soft scoffing noise was emitted from her along with a sigh. 

Probably wasn’t the best idea to focus on that especially with the brewing chanting that is going on in her head. 

_‘Alright alright, what are you trying to tell me now?’_

Footsteps could be heard close by. 

“Shit, _shit._ ” her voice came out a whisper as she quickly looked around the empty room, hoping that by some miracle something would appear that she could use to hide behind. 

The noises became louder as they drew near, as did the knot in her stomach. 

She backed into one of the furthest corners in the room trying to make some time, prepared to scream if needed. 

Her hands rose up in front of her body getting in her typical stance. 

_‘Come get me.’_

A flash of plaid ran quickly past the door. 

“What the hell?” she lowered her arms slightly as she heard the person’s shoes squeaking in the hall, clearly trying to turn back around. 

“Stiles!” her voice was louder this time as she watched him make his way back to the doorway. 

He did a once over on her when he entered the room, arms flailing. 

“I can’t find them, I really don’t think they’re in here.” he seemed out of breath like he had been running. 

“I’m sure this is where they are-” she cut herself off, starting to doubt if she had led them both to the right place “At least I think this is where, I mean-” 

“Lydia.” he reached out to touch her arm 

She tensed for a moment before dropping her shoulders. 

Her gaze met his slowly for the first time since he entered the room, for some reason she didn’t expect him to be so close. For him to be looking at her so intensely. 

“I don’t know where else to look.”

“I know.” his voice was soft, probably the calmest she has heard it since he got back to the town. 

“Maybe the surrounding buildings? Or the court-” she was cut off abruptly by a loud bang coming from somewhere close to them. 

Her arms flew out to hold onto him, to push him down. 

Unfortunately (not really) he had the same idea and rather them help each other, they awkwardly rammed their arms into the opposite one sending them both crashing to the floor. 

More banging sounds could be heard as they quickly tried to get into a better position so that at least one of them was protected. Their stubborn personalities causing them to silently argue over who would be behind the other. 

“Get behind me!” he whisper shouted, lightly pushing on her side so that she was ducked in back of where he was crouching. 

She staggered a bit not paying that much attention to what he had been saying when suddenly feeling her body being moved backwards. 

Nope. 

“No Stiles.” 

He looked at her, his gaze swiftly going from her back to the door. 

She could tell her was getting annoyed. 

“There could potentially be somebody coming in here with guns and god knows what else-” 

“Yes, I’m aware.” she cut him off abruptly, wanting to get a move on. 

“And you want to go…in front of me?” 

There wasn’t time for this conversation which was clear based on the fact that the walking seemed to be right next to the door. Her stomach lurched aggressively as two men entered the room. 

“Get down!” 

Her arm flew out to shove him to the side or in back of her, honestly anywhere that wasn’t in the direct line of danger. 

She took in deep breaths not having long to prepare before she saw the two of them quickly raise their guns in defense. 

“Lydia, wait!” 

Her scream reverberated through the small room, the walls shaking around them. 

 

The two man went flying backwards out the door, their guns flinging to the opposite sides. A loud crashing noise could be heard where they both landed outside in the hall. 

Her lungs felt like they were on fire and the pressure in her head was nauseating. 

She turned around to see Stiles who was laying on the floor looking at where the guys flew out the door, his mouth agape. 

“Next time-” she took a deep breath and extended her hand out to him “You stay behind me.”

\-----

Some time passed along the way, the two of them wanting to find their friends more than anything. 

Well, not more than _anything._ Lydia would rather that this whole problem didn’t exist and her and Stiles were peacefully in college, preferably in bed….wasting the time that seemed to go by slowly.…

“Over there!” Stiles loudly exclaimed. 

Ah, reality. 

The place where she wasn’t even sure anymore if her hopes would come true. Not in the current state of the two of them. The tension had died down ever since they ran into those two guys, she guessed the shock was enough of a distraction to keep them from thinking about their own problems for a while. 

It was at least one thing to be thankful for. 

That along with the fact that for now, none of their own people have died. 

Every part of her was hoping that it would stay like that, but if the feeling that was lingering around had anything to say about it, things were about to get messy. 

\-----

There were times when she was thankful that her abilities weren’t always right. 

Knowing even though she had been _convinced_ and _so sure_ that there was something gruesome yet to be discovered. 

Today, right now, wasn’t one of those times. 

It was clear right away that not everybody made it out alive. The wreckage that took place in this normally quiet part of town a reminder of the war that went on. Of the meaningless battle that could have been avoided. 

Her gaze went over to Stiles who was over near his dad, apparently checking on him to make sure he didn’t get too critically wounded. 

Lydia already knew that he didn’t, still though. It reminded her of one good thing which was that she didn’t have to have the same concerns for her mother who had left the town for work a couple of weeks back. 

There was enough to worry about without her being around. 

A lot of their own weren’t doing the best. 

Nobody had died, well not anybody that wasn’t slightly deserving of it at least but there were some questionable injuries that some of them had. 

Every part of her was hoping that the lack of discontent that she felt meant that this was over..for now. That they had made it through yet another fight all in one piece or at least close. 

She could see Stiles making his way back over to her, relief written clear on his face. 

“I think hes going to be okay. Aside from a few scraps he really managed to avoid most of it.” his tone was light, happy that he wouldn’t have to see his dad go through anything else right now. 

The news made her smile. 

“I’m glad.” she nearly whispered it, wrapping her arms around her middle. “I uh- Scott text me a few minutes ago.” 

“What did he say? Is he okay?” 

“He’s healing.” 

Stiles staggered back a little, as if the update pushed him physically back. She understood that. 

“Finally.” he wiped his hands over his face. 

He looked her up and down.

“I’m glad your okay.” 

She let out a small scoff, her lips turning up one side to form a smirk. 

“Please, they didn’t stand a chance.” 

\-----

 

The night after it all was peaceful. Quiet. 

It reminded her of when she first got back to the town all those weeks ago. 

Everything about it felt surreal. The fact that all four of them made it out alive, without any real life threatening dangers that would linger around as reminders. 

A part from the fact that Stiles had managed to shoot off one of his own toes at some point before he got back, they were all in one piece. 

Her hand reached out to grab the wad of clothes that were resting on the floor in front of her, moving swiftly to pack them back up in her suitcase. 

She bought a plane ticket for tomorrow, finally heading off to MIT. Appreciative for the fact that they even bothered to let her still in given how late she had applied. 

A lot of the things that were planned didn’t work out, the result of staying behind. Choosing to not attend the next stage of her life sooner. 

One of those things to her, seemed to be her current state of relationship. 

It was unknown to her how he was dealing with everything as of right now. After finding out that Scott and his Dad were safe he soon took off to his house to do some of his own collecting and packing. 

She assumed he wanted to get the hell out of the town again, go back to where he actually enjoyed being. 

No part of her blamed him for that. Even though she felt a small bit of discontentment at the fact that he was currently choosing not to tell her anything. 

What was best for him, that’s all she wanted. 

Her phone buzzed on the side table. 

She averted her gaze automatically to it, she couldn’t help but be frightened whenever the thing went off. Scared of seeing more troubling news regarding one of her friends. 

_‘Now you’re just being paranoid.’_

She sighed and picked it up, slightly hesitant. One missed alert, a text message to be exact. Her finger quickly pressed on it when she noticed it was from Stiles. 

“Let me in?” her voice rang out loudly through the quiet room. 

It took a minute for the words to actually sink in, not any sooner as they did she found herself quickly making her way down the stairs and to the front door. 

She opened it swiftly, seeing him standing near the front of her porch holding his phone tightly in his hand. He looked tense. Great. 

“...Stiles?” 

He turned around to face her, his mouth open like he was surprised to see her for some reason. A long breath was released. 

“You lied to me.” 

It was like he just realized it for a second time. The fact of everything seemed to hit him harder, probably a result of not having the entire town to worry about for the first time since he came back. 

“Stiles…” 

“No I just-” he walked forward, clearly trying to get into her house. 

She moved to the side to let him in, closing the door behind them both quietly. There wasn’t much else she could do other than just look at him. 

“I thought everybody was okay..I thought you were okay, finally.” a forced laugh escaped his mouth. “For the past month I was convinced that things were working out and that maybe by some weird possibility the shit that constantly went on in this town was over, at least for a while.” 

“I was trying to help you.” 

“Help me?”

“You don’t need to be here Stiles, coming back could have been worse than it ended up you could have-” 

“What? Died? So could you Lydia! You _know_ I can’t handle that.”

It was her turn to let out the laugh, except hers was far more cynical.

“And you think I’d just be okay if something happened to you?” 

“No I know you’d be upset it’s just-” 

“I wouldn’t be _upset_ Stiles,” she let out a long breath “I’d be _devastated._ ” 

His shoulders fell back down as she said that, seemingly trying to muster up the energy to keep the argument going. “I remember that conversation.” 

He moved to sit over on the couch in her living room, naturally she followed him. 

“It’s hard to forgot.” 

“When I thought you died in that clinic on that table it was all I could think about.”

“ _Stiles.._ ” 

“No, I did. I kept envisioning those words playing out in a life that didn’t have you in it anymore and I nearly lost it. I was so close to that Lydia, completely kneeling over and j-just-” his voice was caught for a moment, “when you gasped and came back from where you went for those minutes, that was the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” 

The instinct to take him in her arms was almost unbearable but his words felt like they were physically weighing her down.

“I’m fine.” is all she could think of to say.

“So I am. But you still didn’t want me here because you were scared right? Scared of something happening again?”

“I can better control what happens to be now, much more than before but you-” 

“The Eichen thing literally happened in May.” 

“That’s not the point.” 

“Then what _is_ the point Lydia?” 

“That feeling you said you felt, of not knowing if I was coming back or not. That’s what I was going through for _three months._ ” 

Her mind finally got control over her body and she moved over to where he was sitting, choosing to stand in front of him as he struggled to come up with something to say. Knowing that, she continued. 

“Getting you back felt like a miracle. None of us knew what we were doing with all of the attempts we made. Hell, at one point I even tried talking to that damn radio again in your Jeep-” 

“I heard you.” 

“What?” 

“You did it twice and I heard you both times.” his voice was low, the fight continuing to drop from it. 

“I--” she looked down a bit bashful, “I didn’t know that, I assumed you couldn’t….” 

He smiled slightly, letting out a breathy chuckle “Yeah, I could tell.” 

While the tension wasn’t completely gone, things were beginning to feel lighter somehow. 

Once getting past the slight embarrassment Lydia moved forwards some more, sitting on the table in front of the couch so that she was directly facing him. Her hands reached out so that she could grab the sides of his face.

“Then you would know how much the idea of you not being around destroys me, how it _did_ destroy me.” 

“Lyd--”

“You’ve said this to me countless times at this point and there isn’t a part of me that doesn’t feel the same way. _I can’t_ lose you Stiles.” 

He leaned back on the couch her hands slipping off of him and he covered his face with his own for a moment. She wasn’t sure what he was doing until he removed them, noticing right away that he was fully and completely laughing. 

She should feel herself flush, all of the heat in her body seemed to rush to her face. 

“What?” 

He kept on going, almost silently. Just laughing contently to himself. It was obvious that it wasn’t done in a harmful way but she could still feel herself beginning to close off. 

“Sometimes it all just hits me.” he said quietly. 

Lydia look the chance to really look at him when he said that trying to understand what he meant by it. Only then did she notice the fact that his eyes were teary. 

“It just hits you?” 

“Us, I guess.” 

Her mouth turned slightly upwards “You guess?” 

“It’s just like _a lot_ you know?” he leaned forwards so he was even closer to her “This whole thing feels so heavy yet light, I don’t know.” 

Oddly enough she understood. 

“I know what you mean.” 

He grabbed for one of her hands, cupping it between his two. 

“I’m not mad about you trying to help me. I get it Lydia, believe me I do.” 

She placed her other hand on top of his, desperate to somehow make him understand in a way that didn’t involve continuous amounts of her trying to communicate effectively. 

“Yeah, _yeah._ ” 

“It’s just…I don’t think either of us will ever be willing to not protect the other.” 

She ducked her head down, focusing her eyes on their overlapping hands. 

“That’s not such a bad problem is it?” 

“No.” he let out a small sigh. 

“Stiles,” she lifted her head back up to look him straight in the eyes, “I _am_ sorry.” 

“If I was in your place honestly, I can’t say I wouldn’t at least _think_ about doing the same thing.” his tone was kind and understanding at this point. There didn’t seem to be much of the tension that was filling it earlier. 

She could feel it leaving her as well, although not entirely. It was clear that she messed up, she hurt him. 

He lifted up their hands and pressed a long kiss into them, holding eye contact with her while doing so. 

God, she loved him. 

“I love you.” 

She swore she could see the tears begin to appear back in his eyes when he look at her. 

“I know.”

**Author's Note:**

> 6B disappointed me but at least we have fanfiction! i'm probably going to eventually make this into it's own little series since I have so many ideas for what could have happened to these two after the show ended. anyways, thanks for reading! (:


End file.
